nothing of importance

I was just telling the hubby this morning how sick and tired I am of being sick and tired. This part of pregnancy is just stinking miserable. At least I'm not quite as religiously devoted to the porcelain throne as I was the last two times. And I'm eating a slightly wider variety of food. Last two times, I was guzzling Gatorade and chomping Twizzlers and fruit snacks. This time I'm actually able to down a little oatmeal. I still can't eat anything more than once or twice. If I see it a third time, I might just lose it. Third time is not the charm.

And smells... Oh. My. Goodness. I can smell a stray pea that Gunnar discarded on the floor. Onions. Gag. I even saw a bacon commercial that almost made me lose it. Even the thought of smells. I have to stick my head in my turtleneck to mask any potentially scary odor. 

Enough about me. Gunnar's second birthday is today, and we didn't really party hearty, but I'm hoping I'll feel better in a month or two to throw some kind of fun little shin dig. We ran by Whole Foods and picked up a lovely little chocolate torte (thanks to me mum) and a little cuppycake in celebration. Gunnar opened his gifts, played with his balloon, and blew out his two candles with gusto. I love this child. 

Gunns has grown up so much in the past few months-- talking like a big boy with full sentences, singing songs, imitating his big brother's shenanigans, and entering into the independence of the twos. "Gunn-gah do dat!" He insists that he is able to do anything, and then when he finds out he can't, he cries bloody murder. But he's generally a mellow boy still who often is serious (especially when dancing), yells to announce his presence, insists that we look at him when he's doing anything important (like riding on Daddy the "elephant"), and plays silly echo games with his made up words ("tobby, "odote", "pumbum", etc.) 

Sometimes I think ahead and wonder how I'll manage with three kids and two arms. But these two are getting to be a little less maintenance, and hopefully I'll have Gunnar potty trained before the little Bambino arrives. 

And just to let you all know... we are doing things the old-fashioned way, which means not finding out whether this kiddo is a boy or girl. I'm actually looking forward to the surprise this time! 

the dark days of pregnancy

I really try to keep thinking of the fluffy, cute little babies that are a byproduct of all this sickness I’m enduring. The first week and a half of sickness was really mild, much easier than with the previous two, where I’d wake up and have to run to the bathroom to throw up. After about 7.5 weeks though, it’s been rough. I have been able to keep some food down, which is an improvement again over the last two pregnancies, but I’ve been so nauseated, I can’t stand the smell of anything, especially anytime the stove or burners are lit. So dear hubby has been cooking for the boys out on the camping stove on the porch. If that isn’t love, I don’t know what is.

I’ve been so drained of energy that it feels like I’m kind of a shadow of what I used to be. When I’m not throwing up, I feel like throwing up. The boys have been trying to help Mommy as much as they can. Magnus seems particularly sympathetic to how I feel, and tries to pat my back or otherwise play doctor. He’s only gotten the flu once, but I think he remembers how miserable it can be. Gunnar, on the other hand, is pretty oblivious to what’s going on—which is good. He just keeps playing and being his crazy self. I’m really thankful to have two healthy little boys. They’re kind of like my trophies for having struggled so hard through pregnancy to get them.

Oh, we did tell the boys that we’re going to have a new baby next summer. Magnus was pretty thrilled, and Gunnar just hovers over my tummy saying “Hi…baby…” I figured it would be easier for Mags to know that Mommy is sick for a good reason, and so far he’s not angry at the baby for making Mommy sick. It’s just “normal” in his mind that Mommy gets sick when she’s got a baby in her tummy. I wonder if he’s got some memory of my pregnancy sickness with Gunnar.

Baby is just about 9 weeks, so he/she already has had a heartbeat for awhile now and has a mouth, ears, eyes, nose, and is the size of a grape. We’ll get to hear its heartbeat in a couple weeks, so that will make it all seem more like a baby and less like a bad case of the flu.

Yesterday I had a really cruddy day. It started out okay, so I attempted to sort some of the boys’ toys (which have kind of blown up around the house since I got sick). But then at some point, I started vomiting and getting a pre-migraine aura (and I seldom get migraines) and numbness in my hand, so I called the hubs, and he came home to watch the boys for me. I’m grateful that his work is flexible enough to allow for this, especially since we don’t live near our families. Anyhow, I threw up at least ten times over the next few hours, and tried to sleep off the headache, which wasn’t successful. So I called in to get a zofran prescription so I could keep some ibuprofen down, and some fluids, because by that point, I was pretty dehydrated. My dear husband kept checking on me the whole evening. I can’t imagine life without him. (Although, I probably wouldn’t be in this situation right now without him either… ha!)

I definitely appreciate everyone’s prayers and understanding right now. It’s not easy, but I’ll make it through by God’s grace. And we’ll get another cute little peanut to snuggle.

captain underpants

You’ve got people that wear their heart on their sleeve, and you’ve got people who wear their underwear as their outerwear. Gunnar had evidently coerced his big brother into letting him wear some of his undies. They just didn’t go on the right way. But I kind of like the look. It’s almost superhero-esque. Like he’s got everything under control and could save me any moment from a sticky situation.

I think he looks so grown up in the last picture. My baby… How do they grow up so fast?

I guess it’s a good thing we’re expecting number three this coming August!!

Merry Christmas!

A couple days late, but we’re sending a joyous greeting from our family to yours!

the way the cookie crumbles

I mentioned that cookie baking this year was going moderately successful. The first batch I made was for a cookie exchange at a friend’s home—what should have been crisp and light Swedish pepparkakor (recipe from my great grandmother) turned out slightly chewy. Saddish. They tasted great with the toasted almonds and the boys didn’t care, but I would LOVE to be able to put out a cookie similar to the ones in the Carl Larsson tins we grew up eating at Christmas.

I next decided to make a batch of caramel topped shortbread. There was a couple line breaks in the recipe that threw me off, and I inadvertently omitted a couple ingredients from the caramel topping so the caramel topping oozed off the top. Nevertheless, they still tasted yummy. That’s what I get for trying new recipes. Ha!

If the oozing caramel wasn’t enough to stop me, I decided to make some super easy, very delicious Swedish thumbprint cookies. But my laziness in measuring the flour (thinking I could estimate sifted flour) made the dough too buttery and they spread flat on the pan. Of course they tasted delicious. They just looked about as good as a 2D version of a 3D movie. Or worse. You decide. :)

I guess if there’s one thing other than recipes (and blue eyes) handed down from the Swedes in my family, it’s stubbornness. I refused to be dominated by my baking mishaps. On to the chocolate crinkles—hubby’s only necessary Christmas cookie. I got back at the kitchen with these…

And the coconut macaroons laced in dark chocolate… mmm…

And a retake on the thumbprints. Along with the cashew brittle (which tasted more like toffee). And the peanut butter fudge (not pictured.)

I am DONE baking cookies (and most of them are out of the house now). Next year, hopefully I’ll be baking at my mother’s house under supervision. :) That or my Gunnar will take over holiday baking. I think he could.

trimming the tree

We did finally get a tree about a week into December. Growing up, we most often would go out to a tree farm and pick out a real tree. Some of my fondest memories are of Saturday afternoons braving the frigid cold to get the tree. This year the rain we had prevented us from cutting down our own tree, but I’m sure it wouldn’t have looked quite as nice as our purchase from Lowes. Our first tree together was one we cut down, and golly was it the saddest Charlie Brown tree! This one’s definitely an upgrade. The smell of a fresh fir in the living room and the sight of a lit tree makes it look a lot more like Christmas around here, even though we haven’t had a flake more of snow.

The boys and I were impatient to decorate it as soon as it made its way in the house, so we skipped the lights (since we were short a strand), and the boys went to work clumping all the ornaments in a few spots, which I promptly had to rearrange. Since then, the boys have been sneaking ornament moves in at least hourly. :)

Oh, I said we were short a strand of lights. Well, it can't be too hard to find boring old white lights in the stores this time of year, right? I had the hubby look at two stores, then I went to three more before finding the LAST stinking box of them. Every store seemed to be carrying such a huge selection of the LED/solar types of lights, that the plain, old-fashioned incadescent miniature bulbs are becoming a thing of the past. Better stock up on those bulb replacements and fuses!

I even got inspired enough to make a star for the top of the tree. I’m really bad at following instructions or having the patience enough to sew patterns, but it still turned out okay. Although we still have to lop about six inches off the top of the tree to make it look less spindly up there!

Gotta get my fingers back in the cookie dough… Cookie baking this year has been about 75% successful. Oh for my mother’s magic touch in the kitchen!

celebrating light

    The people who walked in darkness
        have seen a great light;
    those who dwelt in a land of deep darkness,
        on them has light shone.
    You have multiplied the nation;
        you have increased its joy;
    they rejoice before you
        as with joy at the harvest,
        as they are glad when they divide the spoil.

    Arise, shine, for your light has come,
        and the glory of the LORD has risen upon you.
    For behold, darkness shall cover the earth,
        and thick darkness the peoples;
    but the LORD will arise upon you,
        and his glory will be seen upon you.
    And nations shall come to your light,
        and kings to the brightness of your rising.

    The sun shall be no more
        your light by day,
    nor for brightness shall the moon
        give you light;
    but the LORD will be your everlasting light,
        and your God will be your glory.
    Your sun shall no more go down,
        nor your moon withdraw itself;
    for the LORD will be your everlasting light,
        and your days of mourning shall be ended.

You are the light of the world. A city set on a hill cannot be hidden. Nor do people light a lamp and put it under a basket, but on a stand, and it gives light to all in the house. In the same way, let your light shine before others, so that they may see your good works and give glory to your Father who is in heaven.